4 Stages of Friendship Break-ups
Friends are the kind of people in our lives where they make everything fun and less stressful. Friends are our walking journals, we share to them our deepest and dirtiest secret that we can’t even share to our family and they do the same for us. Friends are your partners in every crime. They are our Soulmate, they live in every cell in our body, they are our home.
But just like everything else, nothing is permanent. Some friendships tend to drift apart regardless of reasons for break ups, sometimes we just have to accept the fact that ending our relationship with them has lessons to learn, and it is beyond our control. So let’s just breathe through it, embrace the pain and let it go when the right time comes. So here are the Stages you will go when you have a Friendship break-ups
- The Anger Stage
In this first stage of break-up just like an ordinary relationship break-ups we tend to hold grudge on them for leaving us behind, or (sometimes for leaving them behind). We think that we can live without them and keep on convincing ourselves that they are not a loss. This is also the stage where we reminisce all the bad things they did to us, like forgetting to invite us on a party, or for not replying to our messages to them or for not coming to our birthday party and a lot of other stuff. We tend to do this because we are keeping ourselves believing the reason why this kind of relationship should end. Thinking that our ex-friends are inhaling the same oxygen we take makes our head boil with utter rage!
- The Anxiety Stage
This second stage covers how we feel after a long weeks without having any kinds of communication to them. It feels like the world is all gloomy even though it is sunny outside, it feels like every oxygen you inhale has poison that makes our lungs ache. It also feels like you’re carrying a 3 sack of rice behind your back from the emotional weights your carrying. This is the start of rewinding all those pure euphoric moments you shared with your bff and that moment you feel like there’s nothing in this world that exists could never break the two of you.
- The Self- Loathing Stage
This is probably one of the most overrated stage in a friendship break-ups. We are so over on thinking what they done wrong to us just like what I said on the anger stage. This is now the stage where we look back on the past that might be the reason for leaving us. We always ask questions to ourselves like, “What have I done?” “Where did I go wrong?” “Is this really my fault?” and a lot of other questions. The thing is that we always put the blame on ourselves thinking that It’s always our fault even if it is not. True friendship won’t break just because the other did wrong, true friends forgive, sometimes it just takes a lot of time.
- The Forgiving and Acceptance Stage
Right at this stage, this would probably be us, finally come to our senses that things won’t turn back the way it was even though how much we try. This is right where we forgive ourselves for doing them wrong. This is also the stage where we finally have the courage to talk to them or just to ask for forgiveness for anything we had done wrong to them. Even though it is hard to forgive someone who doesn’t ask for it, we sometimes forgive them also for the things they did to us even though they didn’t ask for it. This is not because we’re trying to be the good one, this is because we are trying to regain back the inner peace that was once shattered when we broke up with them. Time heals. Slowly but surely, we will be okay again. We can regain our once old self before. When time finally comes, we can now go again to the world. Embracing new friendship that might come along the way and this time, because of our past break-ups with some of our friends we can now be better. We can now be a better friend and we know who to be our real friends.